Australian customs

Oh 'twill be such a gay time! I reflect often on your pending visit, dear friend. Bring live snakes. When Customs stops you, release the snakes. Pandemonium ensues, and you charge the exit. I will smash through the glass doors in a Holden ute in reverse (this is a neat bit of physics) at 18:15 sharp. At that time you should be mid-leap through the air yelling, "Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi Oi Oi!" with your passport out. Get it stamped before you land in the ute. I will then make the jump to light speed and plant my foot, firing glass and debris from under my wheels, hot wind blowin' my hair, smokin' hot babes hangin' in the back seat, and Eddie Van Halen hammertapping on the hood, and we'll take the M4 toll road back to my place because it's worth the $2 to avoid all the traffic on the Eastern Distributor.