24 February 2010

Advances in computing

We have finally created true artificial intelligence.

Introducing... my microwave!  It talks!  Of course, it's only fitted with a small liquid crystal display and not a speaker, so it more reads than actually speaks.  Nevertheless, it not only achieves
communication but accomplishes nothing less than consistent good manners: when I prepare my meal in the microwave, every single time it says to me, ENJOY YOUR MEAL. Without fail.  Even after I've been in a foul mood and neglected my usual "thank you, microwave," it doesn't blink; ENJOY YOUR MEAL the very next time.

Equally, my DVD player.  It never fails to say GOOD-BYE to me whenever I turn it off.

Recently, I've begun a relationship with my air conditioner.

20 February 2010

The Da Vinci Coke

by Dan Brown

An anachronistic 16th-century Coke bottle is found among Leonardo Da Vinci's possessions, and an investigation of ecclesiastical intrigues and secret societies reveals the mystery of the Coca-Cola formula.


by A. A. Milne

The story of a bear that prefers twinks to honey.

Welcome to the Money House

 by Kurt Vonnegut

Collection of Vonnegut discards released by the publisher to milk the Vonnegut name.

The Caste

by Franz Kafka

K. is commissioned as a land surveyor for a mysterious village, but the locals treat him as an Untouchable.

15 February 2010

The Commonest Manifesto

Marx and Engels try to top the sales of their influential manuscript on class struggle with a follow up appeal to the masses. Unfortunately, everyone already had it.